A Judgemental Society
As a newbie in Dubai, around two months ago I was so desperate to make friends just like any other person would be when moving to a new place, especially after leaving behind a bunch of really good friends home. But as a housewife with two very young kids, it wasn’t and isn’t possible for me to go out and look for a job,as would be prefered by many, to find new friends. So again, just like most of us would do, I befriended the internet first and created a blog which is especially to get connected with moms in Dubai. All the bloggers would agree to this that making friends through blog would be a very slow process since I myself already had the experience of blogging before. Then I thought of joining different forums and the first thing I would do is promote my blog there so I’d be able to be in touch with moms in one place.
Of all the forums I joined, Expatwoman was my favourite though they had this strict rule of not allowing anyone to post any kind of link on their forums. I came to know about it after I posted my link for the first time and was deleted and never even tried to post anything as such again. So my second thread post about “turning 30” went really well where everyone encouraged me and participated in the discussions regarding my concerns of gettng old. Though never intended, but the thread did give me inspiration for my next blog post and I’m sure I even mentioned that to them I’ll be quoting them in my next blog, and so did I , with their original usernames they used at that time.
From time to time , I kept posting threads related to just about anything that went on in my mind, like kids’ school, shampoo to use, lotion for kids etc etc. Just recently myself and some of the EW ladies were in the middle of a “shopping” discussion when the subject of “my blog” was raised , telling me …yes may I repeat, telling me not even asking me, that I post all thoses threads just so I can promote my blog to be able to earn money. I don’t blame them, since I know that there are many bloggers whose source of income are their blogs, do practice that on forums, which in my opinion is okay as it won’t harm anyone. Anyone would do anythng to keep their job of course. This is how blogs work actually. We visit each other’s blog, comment, get a comment back, visit forums, post our link , etc etc. So EW having this strict rules have their reasons to be.
Before anything I would make it clear that I see myself earning through my blogs someday, but maybe after 10 years, I think any honest blogger would admit that.
I made my first blog with the intention of giving relevant facts about education and teachers since that is my field and I think I’m quite successful with what I aimed with my first blog and am able to help many as well.
Going back to EW forum experience, everything went well and everyone participated in discussions and answered my questions that I would ask my sister or friend if I have one here, when in the middle of one fun discussion an issue was raised. What the admin did was , delete my account, just because someone came with the accusations of me generating income through my links which I even didn’t post there since ages. I didn’t even receive an email from the admin as to why it is deleted or from any users there asking my side of the story and instead they continued the discussion with a thread of my name ( feeling like a star already) and gave their opinions on whatever they can think of , copy pasting my previous posts, my facebook status, and even a part of my blog post where I quoted some of their forum co-users and above all they took the burden of sparing sometime to look for me on other forums. I was wondering how our society, in this very modern time, be so judgemental? I was shocked to see how my posts were exploited. Well honestly speaking am still in a shock as they all seemed really nice and broad-minded. But my experience with them tells and shows how someone could just judge anyone, create their own assumptions and of course have so much time in the world to go through every thread they see in the forum, barge in and boom….release their insecurities. Even those so-called friends who added me on facebook “unfriended” me or “blocked” me after what happened. Strange but true.
Well whatever happened was a blessing in disguise because though not intended , I got the highest traffic to my blog yesterday 🙂
Let me tell everyone here that bloggers are also humans and should not be treated as aliens. So what if they come to the forums for ideas or post their links? They aren’t asking you money or do you any harm. I also welcomed links coming my way, commented and gave my opinion and I’m still here and not ruined. There are different bloggers, those who post for money and those who post for fun and just to interact with like-minded people and there is no harm in being either of the two. But for a blogger , the feedback and comments for their posts means a lot and is always welcomed.
The issue raised here by me is between a blogger and bunch of people I’d call anti-blogger, at least that’s what I would call them now after their comments. When you think you can judge so well, make sure you are following the process of “how to judge” just the way the judges do in courts 🙂
Writing doesn’t require talent, what it requires are guts to put your thoughts right in front of people gracefully. If you think you can do that, I dare you to do so.